q("f", arguments) May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days Ive stayed alive. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. The people are fucked. George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. George Carlin, Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. George Carlin, We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. 4. Christmas Quotes For Mothers To Make Her Day, These 10 Quotes About Best Friend Love Are Perfect For Showing Your True Colors, 118+ Inspiring Christmas Quotes For Instagram That Will Bring A Warm Glow To Your Holiday Season, Mourning Your Dogs Death With Quotes From Rainbow Bridge, 15+ Rumi Quotes On Happiness That Will Boost Your Mood, These Rumi Quotes About Depression Will Bring You Comfort. Disgusting that people still make that argument that we can never cut defense but we can cut education. The first one is: 'Never believe ANYthing the government says.' George Carlin Believe, Government, Rules To Live By 48 Copy quote Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. In fact, George Carlin had some pretty interesting things to say about government. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, 15. The only person who is with us our entire life is ourselves. Tell them what you've painted is wet, they have to touch it to believe. "ebfg_email", "ebfg_sms"]; We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. var cookiePair = cookie.split('='); Dont just teach your children to read Teach them to question everything that they read Teach them to question everything. George Carlin, 86. Ice Cube Shares George Carlin Quote About Politicians: 'They - Newsweek Because he was a genius, and here are 11 quotes that prove it: 1. Really? Its never going to get any better. Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. The upper class: keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. Required fields are marked *. googletag.pubads().enableAsyncRendering(); You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin, 10. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. George Carlin, 4. George Carlin was one of the most iconic comedians of all time and he had a lot to say about government. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Men are often so foolish as to boast and value themselves upon their passions, even those that are most vicious. That's the problem." "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out." " Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity ." googletag.cmd = googletag.cmd || []; Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. .__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.__prevent_empty_css_file{width:0}.authorModuleDropdownMenu{width:180px;border-left:1px solid #D8D8D8;border-right:1px solid #D8D8D8;border-top:1px solid #D8D8D8}.authorModuleDropdownMenu__dropdownLink,.authorModuleDropdownMenu__dropdownLink:hover{display:block;text-align:left;padding:12px;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", "Helvetica", sans-serif;font-size:14px;color:#000000;cursor:pointer}#authorInfo{display:-webkit-box;display:-moz-box;display:-ms-box;display:box;display:-webkit-flex;display:-moz-flex;display:-ms-flex;display:flex;padding:10px 10px 5px 10px}#authorInfo .authorInfoGroup{-webkit-box-flex:1;-moz-box-flex:1;-ms-box-flex:1;box-flex:1}#authorInfo .authorPhotoGroup{-webkit-box-flex:0;-moz-box-flex:0;-ms-box-flex:0;box-flex:0;margin-right:10px}#authorInfo .authorFollow{display:flex}#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer{border-radius:3px;border:1px solid #D6D0C4;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", "Helvetica", sans-serif;font-size:14px;-moz-appearance:none;-o-appearance:none;-webkit-appearance:none;appearance:none;cursor:pointer;display:inline-block;text-decoration:none;color:#333333;background-color:#F4F1EA;line-height:1;padding:8px 12px;font-size:16px;padding:12px 24px;box-sizing:border-box;text-align:center;margin-left:0px;padding:0px;min-width:38px;height:32px;background-image:url(/assets/down-caret.png);background-repeat:no-repeat;background-position:center;float:right}#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer:disabled{border-color:#DDDDDD}#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer:hover{color:#333333;background-color:#ede6d6;text-decoration:none}#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer:active{background-color:#D6D0C4}#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer:disabled{background-color:#F3F3F3;color:#cccccc}@media (max-width: 540px){#authorInfo .authorFollow .authorDropdownContainer{min-width:20px;width:27px}}#authorBooks{*zoom:1}#authorBooks:after{content:"";display:table;clear:both}#authorBooks .sectionTitle{border-top:1px solid #CCCCCC;padding:10px 10px 0 10px;margin:0}.accordionContent{padding:0 10px}.authorBio{padding:0 10px;margin-bottom:10px}.authorBooksMeta{color:#999999;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;padding:0 10px}.authorBooksMeta a{color:#00635D}.authorBooksTotalReviewCount:before,.authorBooksTotalRatingCount:before{content:"\00b7"}.authorDetailsList dt,.authorDetailsList dd{display:inline;margin:0}.authorDetailsList dd:after{content:'\A';white-space:pre}.authorDetailsList dt{font-weight:bold}.authorDetailsList dd{color:#999999;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;margin-bottom:15px}.authorDetailsList dd a{color:#00635D}.authorSimilarAuthorsLink{padding:0 10px}.authorDistinctWorksLink{padding:0 10px;display:block;margin-bottom:10px}.authorFansLink{font-weight:bold}.authorInterviewsList{list-style-type:none;margin:0;padding:0}.authorInterviewsList .authorInterview{margin-bottom:15px}.authorInterviewsList .authorInterviewAt{color:#999999;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif}.authorInterviewsList .authorInterviewAt a{color:#00635D}.authorInterviewsList .authorInterviewTitle{display:block}.authorName{margin-bottom:10px}.authorShortBio{color:#999999;font-family:"Lato", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif}.authorShortBio a{color:#00635D}.authorQuotesLink{margin-bottom:15px}.quotesList{border-top:1px solid #CCCCCC;margin-top:15px}.quotesPage{margin-left:10px}.noQuotes{margin-top:15px} "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). George Carlin, The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. ", Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. [CDATA[ The only person who is with us our entire life is ourselves. George Carlin, 33. You know why? We think in language. } }, return false; We made 'em up. We havent tried that for a while. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. Pointing out the things which are influencing our society badly with humor is not an easy task to do. George Carlin Sayings and Quotes about life! Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Enjoy! a[a9]._Q.push([c, r]) After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, 2. Thank you! Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. George Carlin, 40. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. George Carlin, 64. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. October 29, 2004. They own all the important land. "I have certain rules I live by. They own you. stylesheet.type = "text/css"; They all said: 'Try to live together peacefully.' My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. You know what they ought to do with churches? 3. The Strange Afterlife of George Carlin - The New York Times BAM! _Q: [] I hate groups of people. Theyre always people who tell us to live together in harmony and try to love one another: Jesus, Gandhi, Lincoln, John Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Medgar Evers, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, John Lennon. "Government want to tell you things you can't say because they're against the law, or you can't say this because it's against a regulation, or here's something you can't say because its a.secret; "You can't tell him that because he's not cleared to know that." Government wants to control information and control . Its no secret that George Carlin was a bit of a political philosopher. The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14stand-up comedy specials on HBO taught us the power of words and how a person can use humor as a weapon. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. // This video is an ideal way to start your day off on a funny and thought provoking note and stay inspired through. He had a way of critiquing and making fun of the government without necessarily getting into trouble. Trouble is, most of them suck. 3140. Authors. George Carlin Shitting on Government for 8 Minutes Straight